Learn from the Past

Assalamualaikum..

      Hope everyone is doing fine. This blog always shows the inconsistency of mine in writting. What ashamed, hffftttt. Thanks to my small pieces of work that makes me boring sometimes and then triggers me to start thinking to write and turning on the comp.

Bismillah, I don’t know whether I deserve to say something like what i’m going to say now or not. I just feel like it, nothing deeper. This is just a story of the past that I won’t forget because i know i will be able to learn from my past.

       Being a teacher was something that I would avoid hardly before. What I wanted to be since I was young and immature (I’m not saying that today I’ve been mature enough, but slightly a bit wiser enough to appreciate life than before, hihi) was soooo far away from what I’ve been today.  I never thought that I would jump to this kind of situation before. Having no choices, dragging in to the trap, but alhamdulillah that I made this step. At moments ago, I wish to become an architect. Drawing future house, having particular projects with lucrative vision and making people’s dream comes true. However I realized that my happiness in solving senior high school’s physics subject was not enough to become an architect. It was because I just could not draw. In the past, I always wonder why I never been succeeded making a straight line, but then i knew that I got my eyes cylinder. That was why I always made a terribly straight line. Yes! What i did from that time was to give up. Actually I hate that side of my self, giving up easily while I should be a fighter instead. Find ways to combat and counter attack that little cylinder also practice to draw. But whatever it was, I just did nothing. I hope everyone here will never does the same thing. Indeed, I was regretting my decision back then to giving up as an architect. Yet, I never regret to take another move which brought me to meet a lot of precious persons. Thanks Allah I chose this way.

       Enrolled to one of the best majors in my university was a pride. Hi, I was an international relation student. What I wanted to be was to become a practitioner. Standing proudly, speaking loudly, living greatly, and others. Yet again, there was a time when an unexpected turns of life coming. The more I get to know, the more I get doubt to be practitioner. That part of process was the one that leads me to take this step, decided to prefer living as an academician.

       Here I am, currently I’m staying back in my home town. A small town where International Relation studies is not available here. My precious mom and dad need me much here. Perhaps they miss their little daughter who grows this fast? Hihii. At least, wherever I am, I believe that Allah always has a better plan. I believe that I will keep changing into a better one wherever it is. I believe when we have Allah, there are nothing that should be afraid of. Allah has his own way of testing and helping his servant!

        And here No International Relation studies, doesn’t mean that I can do nothing. From here, I think I am starting to build my new hobby, Donate. Not materially, but i hope becoming a teacher can be my way to always donate sincerely lillahita’alaa. About what I knew, what I’ve been through, what I got, anything.  Sharing few experiences of mine to others hopefully inspiring my students to be better than me. No more give up, start from small thing, have faith, keep on praying, and finish what you start. At some point, it might okay to give up, but then get back to Allah, beg him! And inshaallah help will be on its way. Amiiinn